Despite the growth of superhero movies, I guess there just weren’t enough popular options for workout shirts. I stalled at 8.
So I had to punt.
That’s right, Cookie Monster is a superhero now.
How did this come about? Well, I just ran out of options. I knew it was a possibility. Early on, I knew I wasn’t finding new shirts. The Hulk shirt I found was a bit of a fluke, and it was also the first that got off trend.
It’s the first that wasn’t just a true logo. And so I had to start scrounging. There were some crappy Avengers shirts that came out with the movie, but they were just too nondescript to really feel like superhero shirts. So I never bought the ones for the Avengers I didn’t already have.
If I was willing to go with compression shirts, I would have had more options, but Fatty doesn’t feel pretty in a compression shirt, so Fatty will stick with what Fatty wants. Maybe if Fatty laid off the pizza (in a little more than 24 hours, I’ve eaten nothing but pizza and one apple).
I had mentally started prepping backup plans the past few months, and I think I’m doing alright.
I started with things I already had.
I got this Blerch shirt a couple of years ago, and I thought it would work. Of course, I signed up for the virtual Beat the Blerch, so I actually have another Blerch shirt on the way, so I will stupidly have a choice whenever it gets to that “hero’s” turn.
I also got to thinking about my app, Zombies, Run! I figured since there was a character, there would be Runner 5 shirts, and there were. The app sells shirts, so I knew that was a backup plan. I ended up buying one off a promotion they were running.
But that still left me two short.
And then Walmart spoke to me and there was a flexing Cookie Monster.
I had taken to walking by the athletic shirts section in Walmart any time I was there just in case something new showed up. It’s actually where I got my first superhero shirts.
Unfortunately, I mostly just found variations of heroes I already had. Then I found some Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle shirts. Unfortunately, I couldn’t find my size.
And now you’re think, “But Q, you’re still one short!”
I was waiting for you to get there. Behold:
And that’s 12. This has been a really stupid, expensive joke, but whatever. Now I just need to find Lydia. Bonus points if you get the reference.